Programming is like sex:

One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was trying to run away from Chuck Norris.

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What's the last thing to go through a bug's mind as it hits the windshield?

His ass.

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A patient says: "Doctor, last night I made a Freudian slip, I was having dinner with my mother-in-law and wanted to say: 'Could you please pass the butter.' But instead I said: 'You silly cow, you have completely ruined my life'."

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